Monday, March 12, 2007

Recife, 12.03.07

Life goes on!
This is a time for new interpersonal discoveries, emotional encounters, reflection and decisions.
What happens when you find out that someone you thought to be something shows to be something totally different? And if this person is a close relative and you come to the conclusion that if it would not be so, you would never be friends?
Maybe I am overreacting but the truth is this person reveals a side of her personality that I find just disgusting.
Right now I am looking for jobs and applying to do volunteer work to keep myself busy doing something positive. I thought that if I am working in institutes which deal with kids in general I can gather some useful information for my future professional life, get acquainted with the Brazilian health care system and evaluate the professional level of other physiotherapists.
I miss my friends and the quality of life I had in Amsterdam.
Here, there is nobody really close to whom I can just talk about my thoughts and feelings with openness. I find everything so superficial and irrelevant.
At home I just decided to keep my mouth shut and speak only when I am asked to.
It seems to exist such a distance between me and my relatives, almost nothing in common. When I listen carefully to the conversations and the matters they talk about I just feel completely foreign.
I try to keep myself open and polite but conceal what I really think and feel just to avoid distress. Some people would say that I am just exercising my politician skills.
So be it!

No comments: